Feeling Left Out

Yesterday we went out in search of a Christmas Festival. Sadly I was quite disappointed with what is presented in Vancouver. Everything we saw was a complete disappointment and not much of anything. I was wishing there was an outdoor skate rink to get people in the festive mood. Sure everyone has indoor rinks but it's about getting outside and enjoying the season. All I see here are people trying to capitalize on spending money which totally looses the true meaning of the season.

Maybe Vancouver is so dull because Switzerland and Germany have such great Christmas markets. Or maybe it's just that I've failed to see where these Christmas markets exist throughout Vancouver. Regardless, I'm missing the wonderful warm gluh wine and everything else that has to do with being cold and trying to feel a bit more cheery. So I'm left with a really bad void in my stomach just wishing I could jet over to Switzerland to get my fill.

To make matters worse, I'm still feeling like a total outsider without an identity. Really I wish I could speed up my process of becoming a Canadian resident as my life would be made so much easier. You see, we opened up our first joint bank account as a married couple this weekend, but I was told because I'm not a resident YET that I could not be primary account holder. I'm not sure if anyone else knows how it feels to be a nobody but I sure still feel that way. I've felt that way since I've left in 2001. I guess it's just one obstacle that will feel bitter sweet when I finally feel like I have an identity. I feel like my identity has been taken away and only time can help me to get it back. Let's just hope that I won't be feeling all too left all that long.